Failing Big

“I’d rather you aim big and fail,” my father tells me,

Mediocrity does not run in the family.

I call him for home improvement advice,

Who have I become?

Private box for the Caps game, the benefit of wealthy friends.

The magic of Xanax,

His jag is spotless.

Jealousy.

At home, I sort through Her client files,

The law firm that will bear my name, the closest I’ll ever get.

Threesomes with her Ex,

They all have clearance levels,

The closest I’ll ever be.

No longer nodding out in the courtyard,

Sunlight hits my wedding ring.

Never boring, my biggest fear.

The life I’ve always wanted,

Why did it take so long?